So guys, its 4/20. I’m not high, but it really seemed like an appropriate title to work with.

Listen, I really need to get off this website. It’s causing me so much emotional distress. Online dating, much unlike online shopping, is not for me. It’s too dangerous for me to look like I do and everyone else on OKCupid to look like they do. They are so sad. All of them.

After a year of this total and utter bull shit, I have to go back to living my life as I used to. Ok Cupid has traumatized and damaged me beyond comprehension and as much damage as I tried to throw back at it, it always won. I don’t think any of these men on here are ever going to be different. This fight is far too exhausting. I’m tired.

In related news, I have also quit Tinder. Tinder is even worse than OK Cupid and I’m not even going to begin to post those messages on here. Essentially more of the same, but in slightly more aggressive tones. No one has time for that too. There’s something about the condition of the internet and dating that do not mix for me. I have to stop trying to figure out what it is that’s turning me off and just accept it for what it is.

So in conclusion, its been a year and nothing’s really changed. It’s just me in my ivory tower of shoes and clothes uptown on the eastside, fighting off messengers, train workers and those guys in the yellow jackets that work for companies that give bus tours of NYC. And since nothing has changed, and I also refuse to change, I’ve got to quit this shit. I’ve taken the liberty of posting some absurd exchanges from last year before I decided to start the blog so please enjoy them as my swan song.

I mean, lets see if in another year I am still single, then I’m joining match because as my dad taught me, “you pay for quality”.

For now, as The Weeknd would say (not gossip girl), ex oh.